The Orphan

This may contain spoilers.

The reason I wanted to see The Orphan was for Peter Sarsgaard, who I have a huge crush on. The Orphan provided a fun creepy vehicle to watch him in for 2+ hours. The movie opens with a violent late term abortion, which ends up being a dream sequence, but is a really weird and unsettling way to open the film. After they adopt Esther from a home for girls she beings to act strange, she's always around when things go wrong. Concerns about Esther continue to escalate when someone winds up dead (we saw Esther beat her to death with a hammer) and she's weirdly attached to her adoptive father; played by my love Sarsgaard.

Things aren't too bad until you find out the twist, which is that this chick is really 33 with some rare condition that makes her look 9 and she is a serial family killer. She tries to seduce the fathers/husbands in families and when she can't (because she looks like shes 9, oh god ew) she kills them all. The scares there are pretty serious, and re-thinking scenes in the movie with the knowledge that shes 33 made me sleep with the lights on last night. There were quite a few unintentional laughs in the part where she was attempting to seduce Sarsgaard.

Orphan is by no means a great movie, but it's still kind of a fun thrill ride, worth a rental, I guess.